Step 1: Despite knowing this should probably be step 4 or something, throw shrimp into a pan with Tony's Seasoning and simmer until they're cooked. Set them aside to get cold and soggy until you're ready to use them. :]
Step 2: Chop half a jalapeno, a few mushrooms, and some garlic then throw it all in a pan to smother, or whatever the correct terminology would be, until your house smells awesome.
Step 3: Put salsa on 3/4 of your crust and pizza sauce on the 1/4 your child will refuse to eat anyway, despite your attempts to make that part "normal" and then bribe her, as she will say, "I can't like it. Buy a good pizza, please."
Step 4: Add the stuff you smothered to your 3/4 of the pizza and pepperoni to the 1/4 your child will, again, refuse to eat and pretend to gag on while you watch.
Step 5: Finish adding all remaining toppings. This is what your pizza should look like pre-oven.
Step 6: Take pizza out and proceed to burn your mouth on the hot-ass, amazing pizza you have just brought forth into this world. Also, begin process of bribery.
I am overcome with the dramatic desire to make pizza now. Maybe, artichoke, mushroom, sundried tomato, and garlic. Maybe a little bit of sausage. Yes, yes that sounds divine.
ReplyDeleteOoooh I wanted to put sun-dried tomato on there, but the only kind I had was the super-sweet kind. Didn't want to risk the integrity of the pizza, you know.
ReplyDeleteYou need to write something up on how to make artichoke edible. Seriously. I hate all vegetable and am slowly trying to find ways of eating them without throwing up in my mouth. :(
Check tonight for vegetables. Not artichokes, though. I don't have any. I promise I'll get to that soon. On my pizza, artichokes are necessary.
ReplyDeletethat looks soooooooooo good!!!
ReplyDelete